Struggles and Loneliness

This post is a bit of a ramble, but I feel much better after reflecting on the Word and praying over it. I hope that you are blessed in the way that I have been tonight through conversation and meditation.

Recently, I have been overwhelmed.

With the pace that the summer has been flying by, and the sheer amount of things that I have (or haven't) done! I am currently working two jobs, or at least trying to balance the hours between the two. One of these has become increasingly stressful, and frantic.

Today, America's birthday, I had the opportunity to work. I'm not the most emotional person, but I was feeling the pressure and almost broke down in the middle of the store.

I have always been an independent person. I don't like to rely on others, I like to know that I can accomplish what I need to on my own. However, deep down I know that the idea of being completely self-reliant isn't true.

I need Christ, and it's okay to not only acknowledge that, but ask for help when the pressure is on. I know that I've felt like a burden when people ask to pray for me, or don't want to seem weak asking for help or prayer. Tonight, I was on Skype with a great friend from school. When meaning to open my Bible to the body of Christ in 1 Corinthians, I looked in Romans.

I came across the following verse (15:30)

I urge you, brothers and sisters, by our Lord Jesus Christ and by the love of the Spirit, to join me in my struggle by praying to God for me

Paul. THE Apostle Paul asks for prayer from those whom he is discipling. Why do I struggle so much to ask for prayer from others, or even pray to God for strength? Is my selfishness in the way, or my pride throwing up a hurdle? Why don't I fall on my face and share my struggles with the Lord. I get frustrated at the way things happen!

Read Psalms 73

¹ Surely God is good to Israel,
to those who are pure in heart.

² But as for me, my feet had almost slipped;
I had nearly lost my foothold.
³ For I envied the arrogant
when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.

⁴ They have no struggles;
their bodies are healthy and strong.^[a]
5 They are free from common human burdens;
they are not plagued by human ills.
⁶ Therefore pride is their necklace;
they clothe themselves with violence.
⁷ From their callous hearts comes iniquity^[b];
their evil imaginations have no limits.
⁸ They scoff, and speak with malice;
with arrogance they threaten oppression.
⁹ Their mouths lay claim to heaven,
and their tongues take possession of the earth.
¹⁰ Therefore their people turn to them
and drink up waters in abundance.^[c]
11 They say, “How would God know?
Does the Most High know anything?”

¹² This is what the wicked are like—
always free of care, they go on amassing wealth.

¹³ Surely in vain I have kept my heart pure
and have washed my hands in innocence.
¹⁴ All day long I have been afflicted,
and every morning brings new punishments.

¹⁵ If I had spoken out like that,
I would have betrayed your children.
¹⁶ When I tried to understand all this,
it troubled me deeply
¹⁷ till I entered the sanctuary of God;
then I understood their final destiny.

¹⁸ Surely you place them on slippery ground;
you cast them down to ruin.
¹⁹ How suddenly are they destroyed,
completely swept away by terrors!
²⁰ They are like a dream when one awakes;
when you arise, Lord,
you will despise them as fantasies.

²¹ When my heart was grieved
and my spirit embittered,
²² I was senseless and ignorant;
I was a brute beast before you.

²³ Yet I am always with you;
you hold me by my right hand.
²⁴ You guide me with your counsel,
and afterward you will take me into glory.
²⁵ Whom have I in heaven but you?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
²⁶ My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever.

²⁷ Those who are far from you will perish;
you destroy all who are unfaithful to you.
²⁸ But as for me, it is good to be near God.
I have made the Sovereign LORD my refuge;
I will tell of all your deeds.

We have every right to be frustrated! But we need to take heart. Jesus has over come the world, and He will 'hold you by [your] right hand' and He is the 'strength of my heart and my portion forever.' When things get tough instead of trying to control everything for yourself, give it up to God. He will make your path straight.

] Paul was retelling the story of his conversion to Christianity in Acts 22. After God tells him who He is, Paul asks one simple question: “What shall I do, Lord?"

I pray that this is the question on my heart as I continue through the summer. What shall I do Lord? What would you have me do?

I pray that you would remain positive through frustration, and rely on God for strength asking him, what shall I do, Lord?

In Colossians we see Paul praying for the church, for believers like you and me.
This too, is my prayer for friends and family alike.

Colossians 1:9-12

⁹ For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you. We continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives,^{[a] 10} so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, ¹¹ being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, ¹² and giving joyful thanks to the Father, who has qualified you^[b] to share in the inheritance of his holy people in the kingdom of light.